| Portrait of Garlic Through a Half-Drunk Glass of Airborne™ |
[Dec. 4th, 2007|12:13 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Anna Ternheim - "I'll Follow You Tonight" | ] |
I was on the subway tonight and noticed that the man across from me was reading from a packet of paper entitled:
Your Next Steps to Join the Nouveau Tech Secret Society
I immediately devoted this gem of data to my hippocampus and repeated the words over to myself several times. When I arrived home, I did a search on the topic: "nouveau secret society". I read and read and read, and it all led me down the same path, the same quagmire, the same question:
How the hell can they use Times New Roman in such a tasteless fashion? (standing so coercively and flirtatiously next to a sans serif font)
So here tonight I dedicate my portrait to the NOUVEAU SECRET SOCIETY (o, not so secret anymore, are we?) in the hopes that they may hire a better typographer. Please tell them when you see them.
Portrait of Joseph Garlic Through a Half-Drunk Glass of Airborne™ #1
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 12th, 2007|10:07 am] |
| [ | music |
| | "Life on Mars" - Bad Plus | ] |
Railroad history
crossing rooms and crossing eyes,
repainting plastic. |
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|
| More feedback from the Source itself. |
[Feb. 23rd, 2007|10:05 pm] |
Hello,
Thanks for your feedback regarding out bathtub crayons! We are thrilled
that you enjoy them so much. We always appreciate great feedback
regarding our products.
Feel free to contact us again if you have any other questions or
concerns.
Best Regards,
S****** W******* | Assistant Manager, Sales Administration, Americas |
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|
| Re: Your Crayola.com inquiry regarding: Color Revolution. |
[Feb. 22nd, 2007|10:24 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  devious | ] |
Dear Joseph,
Thank you for your e-mail and interest in Crayola Bathtub Crayons.
Crayola has partnered with several manufacturers to produce high quality
products. The item you reference is an official licensed Crayola
product. You may wish to forward your suggestion regarding the color
assortment to them at the contact information below:
Logistix Retail, Inc.
6330 San Vicente Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90048
Phone: 888-208-4728
http://www.poprocket.com
E-mail: crayola_support@poprocket.com
If you have further questions, please e-mail back or call us at (800)
272-9652 weekdays between 9:00 AM and 4:00 PM Eastern Time and we will
be happy to assist you.
We appreciate your interest in Crayola and our products. Make
www.crayola.com your online destination for creative solutions, colorful ideas
and fun developmental activities!
Colorfully yours,
A******* M*******
Consumer Affairs Representative
CRAYOLA |
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|
| Obstacles. |
[Feb. 17th, 2007|08:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  optimistic | ] |
Dear Crayola,
I am writing to you today to deeply encourage you to increase the color palette of your "Crayola Bathtub Crayons" from 8 or 9 to a more liberal count. I currently have trouble creating rich soil-like textures for my bathtub mural, as well as blending the current colors.
In your investigation I would suggest at least a 32-count set, if not a 64-count for color-mindful bathtub artists. I would also point you in the direction of your "Crayola Telescoping Crayon Tower" for inspiration on how to contain such a palette. Perhaps even a floating tugboat to house the crayons would be suitable. Thank you for your time.
Sincerely,
-Joseph Garlic
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